One year ago today, I signed the 'For Sale' slip at the
used car dealership horse trader's farm for one 9 year old, 15.3h Chestnut Registered APHA Gelding of unknown past.
It has been a mostly great year, filled with many of the ups and downs that characterize horse ownership and riding.
We went swimming, rode trails, went on a hunter pace, dressed in costumes, rode in a parade, got strep zoo, lived through Snowmaggedon, moved barns, treated for ulcers, switched vets, cliniced with a USEF judge, jumped some crossrails, went to a schooling show, rode bareback on Christmas Eve, and many, many other things.
I feel like I have been whining a lot lately on this blog. I had a good reminder yesterday about GRATITUDE.
I was texting with an aquaintance from a former barn. I mentioned I was boarding at my current barn. Her response was "OMG! That place is AMAZING!!! Wish I could afford it :) Don't have time for rough board or co-op"
And I thought, you know what? She's right. I do board at an amazing place. I am pretty damn lucky. I realized I had started to take it all for granted.
You know why I have been so negative?
BECAUSE I AM AFRAID.
I love Boca, I truly do. I really, really want this to work.
I have been concentrating on the worst cast scenario.
You know what they say about FEAR? False Evidence Appearing Real.
Here is what IS Real. Boca is healthy. He is sound. We board at a kick-ass, awesome place, that we are lucky to be at. Boca is off for TEN DAYS. Not six weeks, not two months, not forever. His back has been treated. I am looking for a new saddle that may be a better fit.
It is just as likely that we will go on to have a successful happy partnership as any other scenario at this point.
The reason why I am jealous of other people on facebook is because I am afraid it will never be us.
I need to let go of the fear. Whatever will be, will be. No matter what, I will continue to make the best decisions for Boca and me.
Here's to the future!