Wednesday, May 27, 2015

One Year Horsiversary


One year ago today, I signed the 'For Sale' slip at the used car dealership horse trader's farm for one 9 year old, 15.3h Chestnut Registered APHA Gelding of unknown past.
 
It has been a mostly great year, filled with many of the ups and downs that characterize horse ownership and riding.
 
We went swimming, rode trails, went on a hunter pace, dressed in costumes, rode in a parade, got strep zoo, lived through Snowmaggedon, moved barns, treated for ulcers, switched vets, cliniced with a USEF judge, jumped some crossrails, went to a schooling show, rode bareback on Christmas Eve, and many, many other things.
 
I feel like I have been whining a lot lately on this blog. I had a good reminder yesterday about GRATITUDE.
 
I was texting with an aquaintance from a former barn. I mentioned I was boarding at my current barn. Her response was "OMG! That place is AMAZING!!! Wish I could afford it :) Don't have time for rough board or co-op"
 
And I thought, you know what? She's right. I do board at an amazing place. I am pretty damn lucky. I realized I had started to take it all for granted.
 
You know why I have been so negative?
BECAUSE I AM AFRAID.
 
I love Boca, I truly do. I really, really want this to work.
I have been concentrating on the worst cast scenario.
 
You know what they say about FEAR? False Evidence Appearing Real.
 
Here is what IS Real. Boca is healthy. He is sound. We board at a kick-ass, awesome place, that we are lucky to be at. Boca is off for TEN DAYS. Not six weeks, not two months, not forever. His back has been treated. I am looking for a new saddle that may be a better fit.
 
It is just as likely that we will go on to have a successful happy partnership as any other scenario at this point.
 
The reason why I am jealous of other people on facebook is because I am afraid it will never be us.
 
I need to let go of the fear. Whatever will be, will be. No matter what, I will continue to make the best decisions for Boca and me.
 
Here's to the future!
 


9 comments:

  1. Oh...I hadn't ever heard that about fear but I like it!

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  2. Happy Horsiversary! I know Apollo's soundness issues have made me so grateful when I ride now. It's not perfect but after our clusterf**k year that's a-ok! :)

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  3. Ah, yes, gratitude. It's so important to remember to be grateful for what you have. Even when some things are not going well, or some things are actually terrible, there is usually something to be grateful for. Totally improves my mental state and my outlook on everything if I remind myself to do that.

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  4. It's so important to look back and appreciate where you are. :-) Boca sounds like a super fun horse and I'm glad you have him.

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  5. With horses it's easy to get tunnel vision about the negative things. Year two is going to be really good for y'all!

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  6. i love your attitude! it's really tough to be in that no man's land, with no clear guarantee that things will get better. except things DO get better - hang in there and congrats on your first year with Boca!

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  7. I know from personal experience how non-productive fear is and how consuming it is as well. It's a monster to be battled repeatedly. We're here if you need us. :)

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  8. Happy Horsiversary! As someone with an aging pony who doesn't ride all that much anymore and definitely doesn't do anything fancy, I completely understand the jealousy - but I also agree that we as owners have to make the best decisions for our own horses and our own situations. Horse ownership is definitely a journey with a lot of ups and downs - but it's a great one. :) Hope you have many more wonderful years!

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  9. My first year with Miles was a roller coaster, filled with the highest of highs and the lowest of lows. It takes time to build a partnership and understand what each horse needs as an individual. You ARE figuring it out and it will get easier. <3

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